The Mental Shift Every Singer Needs (to make progress)

Author

Ivan Lu
September 05, 2025

How do you react when the voice doesn’t come out the way you want?

Maybe it accidentally flips, you accidentally pushed more volume.

Maybe you missed the note.

Do you go? Hmmm. That didn’t quite work. Let’s try it again.

Or do you beat yourself down? Do you get upset at yourself and tell yourself that your voice sounds bad or something must be wrong.

Now whilst a bit of frustration is normal.

If you’re like me in the latter boat.

I think learning to build a more calm and carefree approach is an IMPORTANT skill

Because on this journey of learning to sing

You’re going to make mistakes. You’re voice isn’t always going to be in control.

But if each time you make a mistake, you surround the mistake with a lot of emotional charge. 2 things happen.

  1. Mentally you don’t actually give yourself room to breathe and learn. You’re so focused on it “having to be right”

  2. Physically this manifests as tension and stiffness in the voice when you sing. And it creates this cycle of even worse singing

Both of this end up wounding you stuck with your voice. Now I’m being a bit melodramatic, but you get the point.

So today I’d like to share a few perspective or tool that have helped me and my clients. Keep in mind, I’m not perfect so I always remind myself when i slip up.

Real quick! For those of you who don’t know me. My name is Ivan, I love making music and also teaching singing to students all around the world. On this newsletter my goal is to make learning to sing simple. If that’s up your lane, consider subscribing. If you want to improve your voice faster, check out the links down below for ways to work with me

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Tip #1: Let’s start of with an easy win.

So I love coffee, but sometimes I can get over-caffeinated.

Which means I get a bit jittery and restless.

And I notice whenever I practice in this state! It’s a lot harder to find cleaner technique.

Now for me it’s coffee, but I want to think about what is an equivalent for you? The state you enter into practice matters.

Maybe you’ve just had a stressful day at work. You can’t expect yourself to suddenly unwind and vocalise perfectly.

So some suggestions that have helped me.

(1) If you’re like me, who can get over-caffeinated easily. Maybe get a weaker coffee or skip the coffee for a bit later.

(2) Move your singing practice to a time when you’re generally more relaxed.

(3) Or just have an activity that’s relaxing before you go into singing. Sometimes I like to take a walk or go to the sauna at my gym.

Tip #2: Reframe

Your frame or perspective on the situation can make a huge difference on how you feel.

Now the first one here, I learnt from a friend a few years back.

Which is learning to Zoom out on your own timeline.

Often, when singers get frustrated it’s because at this current time we don’t get it. And we want to make it happen now.

But if you Zoom out. If you kept trying to improve, where would you be at in the next month, next year, next couple years.

Is there really a need to rush and get it now? When really just a matter of time.

I find this brings a lot more calm to me.

Now another thing

I find that a lot of ourselves punish ourselves emotionally for when we make a mistake.

So a reframe I like to use is

How would you treat a baby learning to walk for the first time?

Or someone who’s relearning to walk.

Would you beat them down, every-time they fall or stumble. Or would you support them?

So in the future whenever you notice yourself beating yourself down. Try one of the two reframes.

Tip #3: Building calmness as a habit

The words you say to yourself matter and often comes out of a habit.

For example, think of people who always say “sorry”

A huge part is just a habit.

So the next time you make a mistake in your practice, I want you to try this in your practice

[See video for example]

“Oops”, or “let’s try that again”

It’ll feel awkward at first, because it’s not your habit.

But overtime, you’ll minimise the emotional baggage associated with a mistake.

And it’ll let you to focus on what truly matters which is making the correct technical adjustments

Anyway! I hope these tips can help you enter and practice singing with a bit more calmness and compassion. Not only will this make it more enjoyable, but also you’ll see better results.

If you found this episode useful, please share or give it 5 star wherever you’re listening from. This really helps spread the word and means the world to me. If you’d like to study with me, links are down in description. Take care!

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